Tonight's episode. I missed the last two days and also the first five minutes of today.

OKAY! So Brooke doesn't have cancer. That's nice? There are some tensions between Callum, Brooke and Rachel because Rachel doesn't really like it that Callum and Brooke have been having intimate chats about Brooke's ovaries.

Ruth from the lovely bones is now dating Hunter. God she is a very very bad actress. I don't understand it. She has the weakest deliveries and is outshone by COOL GUY, if that is imagineable. She doesn't want to stick it to Hunter today. She is a lady. "Easy tiger, don't trash the place".

OH! It looks like Sophie and Ash have broken up! That was fast! I seem to have missed quite a lot. Um so Ash is hunting Sophie! In the park! He says he is just reading a book in one of his favourite spots.

There is some "famous" guy. He isn't actually famous in real life, just on this show. He is a league player or something, in the shortland st universe. Callum wants to bump him up the waiting list so they get good publicity. This is boring.

AD BREAK

Magnum Golds are delicious.
The new John Mayer album is out. He used to bang Jessica Simpson.
Ew that creepy omen horse bank ad
Some vampire show.. girl: "What....are you??!" Guy: "A vampire" Girl: "Oh my god!" Guy: "Don't look at me with those judgey little eyes". Too many vampire shows. No more thanks.

SHORTLAND STREET BACK!

Hunter and Cool guy are fighting. Cool guy liked Ruth now he is mad that Hunter is going to soon stick it to her, hard.

Chris doesn't want to bump up the famous guy. Still boring storyline.

Maxwell's daughter Ula is starting at Ferndale High. Hopefully she is the new Minnie. I wish these were better storylines. Look at the awesome OLD storylines featuring Minnie! "Marise Wipani who played the role of James Scott's sister Rebecca Scott from 2008-2009, also played the role of a patient called Morgana who supposedly haunted the then Shortland Street Medical Clinic on her stay in 1993. Morgana later returned in 1995, having been revealed as the head of a witches' coven that Minnie and Lulu were interested in". !!!!!!!!!!!!! Hell yes! Bring back these kind of storylines, less patient waiting lists and Hunter, Cool guy, Ruth from the Lovely Bones love triangles.

TOBY IS BACK WITH HONEY CHICKEN FRIED RICE YUM YUM. Sorry I missed the main plot points because I was excited about my honey chicken fried rice. I am sure nothing good happened.

"A girlfriend can tell when a chick has eyes for her man"- Tracey "Stinkface" Morrison on Ruth from the lovely bones and her crush on Scotty "dead wife" Scotterson.

Bizarre Maia, Sophie and Nicole lunch. Very ham-fisted attempt to do some serious exposition on creepy stalker Ash. Nicole : "Well he will be getting a visit from us! We are WAY scarier than your dad" - cos they're lesbians, see?

"you better stop him before something seriously bad happens"- FORESHADOWING.

AD BREAK

Toby: "If the mad butcher was really mad, would it be unethical to buy his products?"

Has anyone ever seen "Go girls"? Is it shit? It stars Delphi? She's a bit of a looker.

Today I read that 50cent postage stamps are going up to 60cents because no one wants to use the post anymore. I don't think rising the price will encourage people to use the NZ post? I am not an economist though so what would I know?

SHORTLAND STREET BACK

For some reason Sarah and TK are good friends despite her cheating on him with Maxwell. He is going to set up a marae clinic? he will be away for months? what? i think she still loves him.

I miss Sean.

Hang on, is this famous patient actually famous? Sonny Bill something or another? if so, this is MIND BLOWING. It's almost like this show is a reality show? IS IT??? no i think it isn't.


Ruth from the lovely bones does not suit beige. She is macking it with Hunter in the hospital corridors to make Scotty jealous. It's pretty gross.

Ash is still stalking Sophie. It's good. He has a written warning for stalking her. Like how you can get a written warning for a bad mystery shopping report. Erin thinks this creep is hot. I mean, I get that he has good curly hair but I don't like his necklace.

Rachel and Chris are bonding over Callum not getting his way over this famous character. Chris is talking about Callum being "all wrong" for the role of CEO. What he REALLY means is that Callum is "all wrong" for sticking it to Rachel. I see through his charade.

END

Oh gosh! Tomorrow Sophie is walking through a park at night (why does she keep walking through Ash's favourite stalking spot?) and she calls out "WHO'S THERE!!?!?" it looks dangerous. Narrator: "A decision will change a life"! OH! Sophie could be killed? maimed? "attacked"? Maybe this will take a turn for the Lovely Bones.

END END

I never watch Hell's kitchen. Tonight is no exception. At 9:30 Curb your enthusiasm is on! I have a headache. Today I called up acheived lots of things on my 'to do list'. On tomorrow's list is 'eating a plum choctop'.